Well, after two weeks of basically begging for questions…..GEEZE! The fucking floodgates opened! Leigh and I were literally stunned at the volume of questions that were emailed to us. Apparently its feast or famine with you kinky perverts.
So for those of you who submitted questions, a sincere “Thank You!” And to those of you who I replied to, well, I am afraid that we just simply did not have the time to give all of the questions the attention they deserve. And do they deserve it. Beautiful, thought provoking, insightful inquires filled the Inbox of The Dom Next Door™ World Headquarters.
And almost all of them were directed to the lovely Leigh.
We (or more accurately she) could have easily answered all of them with a few half-assed, obligatory sentences, but that’s just fucking rude. Our Followers deserve so much better than that. So in the interest of giving each inquiry the attention and thought out reply it is richly entitled to, we decided to limit this week’s installment of IWASV to answering a single question. And since Leigh has apparently become our resident Letters To The editor (yes, lower case on purpose) its also fair to her as well.
I promise all of your questions will be answered via this feature of TDND™ and in a timely manner. My sincerest apologies for not being able to do so all at once. I’m busy enough doing one doll at once…heh.
I’m thrilled that so many of you are interested in learning more about Leigh! She is amazing. And hopefully we will all see more of her around TDND™, but only I really get to see more of her…heh again.
So, without further adieu, this week’s question came from TheOthers1. Her question and Leigh’s response (in italics).
What do you think about when you’re in the moment? Particularly what are you feeling (how he makes you feel or any conflicting/negative thoughts).
Honestly, I am not really thinking at that point. It’s hard to really explain well, but I zone out. Everything centers on the sensations and feelings. The way His hands are demanding and punishing hurts like Hell, but in a good way. There are no negative thoughts going through my head because we have talked beforehand and He knows what is and is not okay, and I trust completely that He will respect that. So it frees me up from having to worry that He’ll do something I don’t want Him to.
Also, I’m curious as to what attracted you to him? I read the post about why you participate in a D/s relationship, but I guess what I’m wondering is what did you feel was missing that led you to wanting to practice the lifestyle (at least in the bedroom)? I hope my questions all make sense. I’m always curious about this stuff. Thanks.
Initially, I was attracted to Him because he was hot. LOL. In the interest of this blog and to prove that we are in fact, just The People Next Door, I’ll tell you that we’ve been married and monogamous for nearly two decades. Scot is my best friend and the person that I trust and rely on more than anyone else. At the beginning, we piddled around with the usual; blindfolds, hands tied, light spanking, etc., but it was mostly me doing all the topping. I am controlling and dominant and have to be in charge all the time. Or I did. Then we discovered that I liked pain. Not harmful pain, but the kind that pushes you right to the edge because it hurts oh so fucking good. So we started playing around with Scot being in charge. Keep in mind that years passed between these stages, and it was never a lifestyle choice at that point. We were experimenting mostly. We were having fun. And it sort of blossomed from there. A pair of leather cuffs here, a flogger there, chains and eye hooks, etc., and we gradually transitioned into the place where we are now.
There was nothing missing for me honestly. I think what led us to the place we are now is simply an expansion of what we had learned over all those years of playing. I like to be restrained. Okay, I really like to be tied up. 😉 And yes, good pain got me off, but Scot never really let Himself dish out what we now know to be REALLY good pain because He felt like He shouldn’t enjoy doing it. It’s hard to reconcile that hurting or being hurt by the person you love can be an amazing, exciting, bonding experience.
It wasn’t a years in the making decision. It wasn’t an epiphany one morning over coffee. It was just something that we both had enjoyed and to get 100% out of the experience, to find out what it was really like, we decided to fully explore the boundaries of what we each liked and wanted. So far, its been amazing and I can only surmise that it will get even better.
The Dom Next Door was born so we can share this journey with other people who may read it and realize that just because they look one way on the outside, everyone has the potential to be kinky behind closed doors. And it might just be your neighbor. 😉